Reading Homestuck Part Seventeen: ==> Jade: Feed the dog and Ignore the Jerk!

From here to here.

The end of the intermission leads to an [S] command titled Midnight Crew: Act 1031. We go to an animated sequence that reveals a purple city. It is a story of jazz and rival gangs in a city that never sleeps. The titular gang is made up of four individuals, Diamonds Droog, Clubs Deuce, Hearts Boxcars, and Spades Slick. (Please note that these guys appear to be of the same species as WV.)


Jade kills some time watching gangsters be gangsters then contacts Dave. She may or may not be teasing him about being “so cool.” (I tend to lean toward “teasing.” I do not think Jade necessarily takes his claims of cool seriously, though she may think of him as cool in a dorky-cool kind of way.) They chat about the package that Jade sent John. Jade mentions it will get lost, and then found again, when John really needs it. Dave is extremely nonplused! He has absolutely no pluses, when it comes to Jade and her predictions. She ends the conversation.

 There is another [S] command, Dave: Strife. We first see what looks like a combat option screen, but this is destroyed. Dave is up on the roof, facing off against Lil Cal and a blurry shadow that is apparently manipulating the puppet. (Dave’s Bro is insanely fast.) The shadow is Dave’s Bro, who is kicking his little brother’s tail with a puppet.

We then go back to Jade, who is now talking to Rose. Rose needs some frighteningly accurate yet infuriatingly not specific information, and Jade is apparently the go-to girl for said information. Jade mentions they won’t be able to talk for very long because Rose is going to lose her connection. Jade also mentions that Rose will have to “enter.” Rose tries to get more information out of Jade. We learn that Jade had prior though nonspecific knowledge of this game. Jade cryptically explains that the reason why Dave is unreachable is because he has a lot to do first. She also states that Rose has a lot to do as well, then signs off with her.

The next command is for Jade to be the other girl. We see Rose at a point in time that is several hours in the future. It turns out that there is some sort of secret passage underneath the cat mausoleum. Since it is getting very toasty, Rose takes her stuff including her cat and heads down the passage.

Then we go back to Jade. She is directed to contact John, but she is not able to do this. John is still away from the keyboard. Jade has awareness that she will not be able to get a hold of John until later. She also has prior knowledge that they will both have their hands full. She packs her lunchtop and heads downstairs. The next command is an [S] command. Jade: Descend.

This is a short animation that gives us a close up of a few of the string reminders Jade had tied around her fingers. The next command is for something taking place in the future. Years and years in the future.

We see a huge white tree and a giant metal sphere. A mechanical worm rises out of the sphere and seems to be somewhat perplexed. There is a link titled “under bare white branches a sentry wakens.” This creature spies a hardy apocalypse survivor and her cart of mailboxes. The creature eats the mailboxes, much to the outrage of the apocalypse survivor. The survivor immediately reaches for their sword.

Then we shift to the game faq. This particular faq seems to have been written by John.  It explains some things about the punch designix, and something about the code that turns up on the backs of the punched captchalogue cards. There is a link to something called a punch card calculator. I am not entirely sure what it is supposed to do.

Meanwhile, Rose in in the laboratory below the cat mausoleum. Rose is instructed to look for mad scientists. The lab however, is empty of scientists, mad or otherwise. There is however a kiosk. A kiosk that operates an enormous “hubgrid.”

Next, Jade is advised to transportalize as far down as she can go. She ends up in an area with lots of hunting trophies as well as a few “curiosities.” Jade cannot go all the way down to the foyer because there is a very large trophy blocking the transportalizer. She continues downstairs. We see that Jade’s Grandpa also collects suits of armor! He also collects mummies, blue ladies, and lots of other things. The Daughters of Eclectica are mentioned here but I don’t think they come up again.

At the bottom of the stairs is a giant green snaky thing with a human head and torso. This creature is surrounded by ring of candles. It is also blocking the transportalizer with its vast bulk. It looks a great deal like the logo for Jade’s browser, Echidna. Next, Jade gets pestered. carcinoGeneticist, a denizen of Jade’s troll slum is pestering her. He seems to aware that today is the day the game begins. He is extremely unhappy with Jade because apparently she is going to mess something up. He seems in his own rude way, to be attempting to reason with her and convince her not to do whatever she’s going to do. However, he is also being a mega-jerk so Jade tells him so and blocks him.

The next direction is for Rose to look at the kiosk. There is a map of each hub’s index, and one of the hubs is apparently unliked. Rose is next directed to go the center and do a goofy dance. There is a green “stage” in the center that we recognize as a transportalizer. Rose rejects this direction and attempts to plug her computer into one of the hubs. This causes all of her things to fall out of the sylladex. The corpse of her cat lands on the transportalizer. The cat vanishes.

Rose is told to examine her fetch modus. She makes a few adjustments to her fetch modus that very much improves her organization and layout. She is then directed to find the hub. When she finds the hub she captchalogues it and goes in search of a better place to sit. As she’s looking around, she spots a screen with a very ominous countdown.

Next, we go back to the future. In the future, we see the apocalypse survivor and another count down screen inside the mysterious sphere. The mysterious sphere begins to produce more “worms” that turn out to be a form of locomotion for the device. We next see that the device had helicopter blades. The great sphere-building flies off. The next command is for Dave. He is directed to Abscond.

Part Sixteen | Part Eighteen


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Filed under ep synopsis, homestuck, Reading, web comic

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